And then...: Black as Cole
by Lilian
Summary: Next in the series. Cole is human now. What does that mean to him?. Who is he, now that Belthazor is gone?.


** "And then...: Black as Cole" **,  
  
by Lilian.   
  
lilian413@yahoo.com  
  
AN: Next in the 'And then...' series. Please keep in mind I haven't watched anything beyond Black as Cole, and I'm probably contradicting every single thing that has happened on the show since then, but I needed some fluff.   
  
Please review!.   
  
  
  
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"Just because you're not a demon anymore, doesn't mean we can't live in sin...".   
  
Cole let her draw him over her body, and kissed her.   
  
His head was a mess, his thoughts jumbled and clouded. His brain wasn't functioning normally, and it hurt to think too hard... but kissing Phoebe always made it better.   
  
Kissing her was heaven.   
  
It was as if all his worries were washed away, by her tender lips and soft body under his own.   
  
He needed to feel her, needed to reassure himself she was still here, with him. Even if he had lost his powers, lost his *identity*---   
  
Her daring, small hands made their way into his shirt, and caressed the skin underneath. And he felt himself responding, much faster than before.   
  
"My, my, Cole. Did you stop and buy fruit on the way back, or are you just happy to see me?".   
  
Her husky whisper, right on his ear, while she trailed kisses through his face felt like balm to his battered psyche. She still loved him. She still wanted him.   
  
Without even realizing it, his thoughts flew over the events of the day, focusing on one that still hurt, that still stung--- and it wasn't the loss of his powers.   
  
He understood why she hadn't said yes to his proposal. Understood her fears, her doubts and her hesitation, because they were his own.   
  
He hadn't meant to blurt it out like that.   
  
He had wanted it to be special, with candlelight, and roses, and expensive wine, and a walk under the moonlight...  
  
He hadn't felt the scavenger coming, as it lurked from above them, watching them with curious eyes. And not because it had been a particularly cunning demon (heck, his stench had covered the entire alley!), but because he had been distracted.   
  
Distracted, watching *her*.   
  
Watching as her hair flowed around her face, framing features so familiar, he could draw them in his sleep. Watching as she walked around, confident and sure--- powerful. Beautiful.   
  
He seriously needed to get grip.  
  
Lately, when the idea of proposing to her had first made its way into his brain, he had began getting sloppier. And in a life like theirs, there was no room for being sloppy.   
  
Being sloppy, meant being dead.   
  
And then she had screamed in surprise, and even a tinge of fear, and the demon's whip had curled against her beautiful ankles, lifting her, taking her away from him---  
  
Out of reflex, he had grabbed her, trying to keep her close.   
  
That had probably saved her life.   
  
The scavenger was drunk with the new kill. It had probably just eaten, and the energy coursing through it's body stopped him from attacking them any further. But it was still strong, and Cole could feel Phoebe slipping from his grasp.   
  
One look into her scared eyes, and a plan formed in his head.   
  
He gave her one nod, and she understood.   
  
How, for the life of him he could not know.   
  
But she did, and he counted, and fired.   
  
As they were propelled backwards, the demon slime covering them, Cole embraced her, cushioning the fall with his body.  
  
"We really have to stop meeting like this".   
  
He wasn't sure what possessed him to speak. Maybe it was the adrenaline, or the green goo, or her bright smile, or her chocolate eyes sparkling with mischief---  
  
"Marry me".   
  
He had expected tears, crying, or even unconfined excitement.   
  
He did not expect the stiffening of her body, or how her eyes closed him out, or how her lips tightened. Neither did he expect the word that had come out of her pouty red lips.   
  
"What?".   
  
The drive home had been silent and uncomfortable. Phoebe refused to look at him, her eyes stubbornly fixed on the passenger's window. And when they had reached the manor, she had jumped off the car, and flown inside.   
  
He had trailed behind her, insecurities he didn't know he had making their way into his heart.   
  
Maybe she didn't love him. Maybe she was just using him. Maybe he had done something wrong. Maybe she wanted to break up with him.   
  
Things had gone downhill from there.   
  
Emma, and her little revenge crusade against him. Sykes, and his copycat routine. The flash of uncertainty that flashed through her eyes, when Emma pointed at him as her fiancé's killer.   
  
And then Belthazor had died.   
  
He vaguely remembered giving in, allowing the demon to come forward. He had embraced the darkness, trying to save her--- even if she had begged him not to. And then things were blurry and unclear.   
  
He thought he remembered hearing her voice, through a haze of red, of anger, of need to kill something... and he had tried to come forth, tried to stop Belthazor. He had fought him for dominance, trying to regain control of a body that was rightfully his.   
  
And he had been winning. He had been this close to stopping him---  
  
And then something had exploded on their back, and it hurt, and the pain, and the fire, and the heat---  
  
They had turned, Cole Turner and Belthazor blurring into one, and they had seen Emma standing on the doorway, victory in her eyes, revenge in her hands...  
  
And then the pain had stopped.   
  
And he realized he was kneeling down on the floor, gasping for breath.  
  
He wasn't dead.   
  
He wasn't dead...  
  
{Phoebe}  
  
As if she had heard his silent plea, she suddenly appeared in front of him, her features worried and unshed tears shinning in her eyes. She had hugged him, and he had hugged her back. And things didn't seem so confusing anymore... he was with Phoebe, he didn't need anything else.   
  
But then she had stood up, slipped from within his fingers, and he could only stare forward, to where her body had just been.   
  
He could faintly hear her defending him. Was it him?. Who was he, anyway?.   
  
"Cole?".   
  
Her voice brought him back. And he realized he had been spacing out, leaving her--- again.   
  
"I'm here".   
  
"Are you okay?".   
  
He took his time, considering the possible answers.   
  
No, he wasn't okay. Everything he had ever been had been taken away from him, in a sudden, unexpected twist of fate. Everything he had ever known to be true, wasn't even a fact anymore.   
  
Yes, he was okay. He was finally rid of a heavy weight in his heart. There no longer was a whispering voice in the back of his head, fighting for control. He was human, as he had once wanted to be (I want to be!), for Phoebe.   
  
"I'm not sure".  
  
Phoebe rolled them on their sides, occupying most of the bed. He had always been huge, covering most of the mattress all by himself, while she sometimes found herself swimming in it. But it was okay. She liked it when he was in her bed. She liked it when he was with her.   
  
As Cole nestled his head in the crook of her breasts, and slowly breathed in and out, unsure how to use the fully human lungs, Phoebe wondered what would become of them.   
  
Sure, she wanted him to be good. Wanted him to be free of the temptation, of the mark of the Brotherhood... but not like this. Never like this.   
  
She knew first hand how things thrust in your face tend to scare you, and you freak out. Prue and Piper had, back when she had read the release-our-powers spell in the Book of Shadows for the first time.   
  
Had it been three years already?.   
  
It was only a blink away, when she had just returned from New York, trying to keep the straight face in front of a scowling eldest sister, and a referee Piper trying to make them talk to each other.   
  
It had been in this very same room where the bond of sisterhood had been re-established. She had been sitting right in this bed, when Prue had walked in, and offered her blankets. And her acceptance, and trust at the same time.   
  
And now, she lay here, with the man of her dreams in her arms, with the man who had asked her to marry him--- with the man who she had said no to.   
  
Phoebe wanted to say yes... wanted to be his for eternity. Wanted to feel the weight of a wedding band on her finger, and to promise to cherish him forever, in good and bad, in sickness and in health.   
  
But she was afraid.   
  
And she was confused, feeling guilty for causing him pain, and feeling thrilled that he had asked.   
  
She kissed his forehead, her hand resting on his chest, relishing in the strong, human heartbeat that thumped underneath.   
  
Finally, he was safe. Safe from evil, away from the Source's radar.   
  
And that made her happy, happier than she had been in a long time.   
  
But--- she bit her lip, trying to find the proper words.   
  
Were there proper words for situations like these?.  
  
"It's okay".   
  
She tried to give him the reassurance he needed, tried to tell him with her body what her lips could not say.   
  
Cole was a desperate man. Half of him, was missing. Half of what he had been, had just died. Died, in the floor above, reduced to ashes, scattered in the wind.   
  
What was he, then?.   
  
What was he supposed to do, now that his powers were gone?. How could he protect her, his beloved Phoebe, from the harm he *knew* was coming?.   
  
"Is it really?".   
  
She cupped his chin in her delicate hands, and forced him to look at her in the eyes.   
  
And in there, Cole saw love. Love for him. All for him. Always for him. Demon or not, Phoebe *loved* him. With her heart, her soul, her body and her mind.   
  
He was the luckiest man on earth, having everything a man could ever want... why did he feel so empty then?. Why did it feel wrong?.   
  
He had wanted to relinquish his powers. He really had. Before the whole Brotherhood ordeal, he had been ready to give them up, and live his life as a mortal, by her side.   
  
Even after one hundred and fifteen years, a demon could hope.   
  
But many things had happened since then. Things he tried to forget, and at the same time, kept in his mind, because they were all about her.   
  
His betrayal, her forgiveness, his change, her hopes--- it had been hectic, and at the same time, memorable.   
  
But now he knew he wasn't of any use like this. That's why he hadn't insisted on the potion. And he knew Phoebe had forgotten too... or at least refused to talk about it. And he had accepted the idea that he would have to stay a demon for a long time. At least until the Source was killed.   
  
But one human, one spiteful, bitter human, had taken the decision away from him.   
  
And he didn't know whether to hate her, or thank her.   
  
"Who am I, Phoebe?".   
  
She had answered that question earlier. And she had the feeling she would be answering it for a long time from now on.   
  
"You are the man I love".   
  
He sat back, his powerful muscles stretching, and aching from the stress of a hundred years worth of use. Funny, how they seemed to be catching up with him.   
  
"I don't know. I'm confused. Half of me feels free--- the other half feels incomplete".   
  
Phoebe could only barely grasp what he was trying to say.   
  
She had lost Prue recently... and she had been a part of her so ingrained in her psyche, she hadn't even realized it until she was gone. But Cole, Cole had lost a part of *him*. In the literal sense of the word.   
  
"Don't push yourself. Give it some time. It's all new and fresh to be thinking about it".   
  
He looked down, to where she rested upon his chest. And once again, marveled at her beauty, and at his luck, for having her.   
  
"I can't. It's all I can think about".   
  
Her frown burrowed, as she considered his answer. Phoebe was a woman with great imagination--- and her quick mind came up with a solution fairly quickly.   
  
"Maybe I can distract you...".   
  
His eyes darted to her graceful body, as it rose on the bed, and stretched like a cat. Years of kick boxing, demon vanquishing, and free life-style had paid off. Phoebe had a body most women would envy, and most men dream about.   
  
And she knew it.   
  
She sat on all fours, her shirt and her underwear the only clothing still on. And she smiled wickedly, as she purred and lounged about.   
  
She knew he needed this. He needed to think about something else... to take his mind off the drastic changes in his life. It was all happening too soon, happening too fast. If there was anything she could do to make him feel better, then so be it.   
  
Not that she wasn't enjoying herself, by the way.   
  
"Phoebe...".   
  
He purred her name back at her, knowing how much it excited her. Knowing that she was doing this for him; not because she didn't care, but because she cared too much.   
  
She unfolded, almost oozing around the bed, until she was straddling him, making sure his attention was focused on her.   
  
He never was a difficult subject, when it came to seduction.  
  
"I love you".   
  
She bent forward, pressing her lips on his own, in a kiss so light, so chaste, it almost wasn't a kiss at all.   
  
And all thoughts flew off his head, when she began making a trail of kisses from his mouth, to his chin, down his neck and into his chest.   
  
{thank you, Phoebe}  
  
He thanked her silently, thanked her for understanding, for knowing, for being there--- for supporting him, when he was down so low, he wasn't sure he was ever coming up.   
  
And she smiled knowingly, thankful she had the Power to alleviate some of his troubles.   
  
It was then that a sudden flash of logic made its way through passion, and cooled him down like a bucket of ice water.   
  
"Phoebe".   
  
She did not answer, too swept off in her own pleasure, and the desire to pleasure him, to listen.   
  
"Phoebe".   
  
He tried again, louder this time.   
  
"Hmmm?".   
  
She barely acknowledged him, busy kissing every inch of skin she had available. Which was a lot, since his T-shirt lay discarded somewhere in the floor.   
  
"We should stop now".   
  
That stopped her. She raised again, looking into his eyes, wondering what she had done wrong.   
  
"Why?".   
  
He smiled, taking her hand, and placing it over his heart. His human, beating, pulsing heart.   
  
Phoebe just raised an eyebrow, her eyes questioning.   
  
"Protection".   
  
It took her a minute to realize what he was talking about.   
  
Demons and humans could not bear children. Well, male demons could not get a mortal woman pregnant. They hadn't had to worry about protection before... human diseases did not affect demons.   
  
But now, their DNA's were compatible, and they could perfectly well create life.   
  
And she understood, her eyes softening at the thought.   
  
"Fine, but first thing in the morning, you're buying some".   
  
As they cuddled together, lovemaking skipped, and replaced by snuggling, he raised an eyebrow, and asked out loud.   
  
"How come *I* have to buy them?".   
  
She giggled from within his embrace, and spoke softly, mischief obvious in her voice.   
  
"You're the guy, you're the one who's desperate to get some".   
  
He sighed loudly, caressing her hair.   
  
"And?. Don't you want 'some' too?".   
  
She just muffled a laugh, and burrowed deeper in his lap.   
  
"Yeah, but a girl can always have fun on her own, you know?".   
  
Her shriek of surprise was muffled by the pillow, as he turned her over, and began tickling her.   
And for the night, they did not think about the events of the day, and enjoyed each other, like they had never done before.   
  
They would need it for times to come.   
  
But for now, they rested, recovering, healing... loving.   
  
  
  
  
The end  
  
  
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I know, I know. Nothing much happened. But I felt like they needed a break, okay, so I gave them one. Besides, *I* needed a break from CoH, and what's best that this?. Pointless, needed WAFF (that stands for Warm and Fuzzy Feeling, BTW), with a little angst thrown in the mix. Hope you liked!. 


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